I am writing a post today that I know ABSOLUTELY nothing about............ The View, The Bachelor, and men. Yep..... I am sooo out of my comfort zone.
Yesterday, I am getting ready for Retail-Hell and The View is on tv. Now -- I never watch The View but I sat there as they were reviewing the previous nights episode of The Bachelor .......... also something I have never watched. The closest thing that I watch to The Bachelor is Jane Austen and there has never been a hot-tub scene in Pride and Prejudice. No bikinis in Emma.
In those two or three brief minutes -- I experienced a flashback. Not the 1960's type flashback but an emotional flashback.
Now I have been with Honey for 13 years. Thirteen wonderful years. But I was divorced for over 19 years when we got married. In those 19 years, I had a date or two or three. And could I ever feel for those girls!!
I haven't seen this so it is totally out of context but having been there, done that, I know how the conversation goes.
First of all, he says "Tell me anything, ask me anything". So you manage the courage and the guts to spill your heart out. These poor girls were pouring their hearts out to The Bachelor, telling him their deepest inner thoughts. Suddenly, he gets The Look. Now -- this is akin to the deer-in-the-headlights-look. Total blankness.
You can hear his thought processes going......... "Shit! I didn't want to talk about this!". No -- he wanted to talk about his car, his job, his dog or his golf-handicap. Anything....... not feelings!!! Anything -- Feelings. Two different things!! Unfortunately, we as women don't get that!
So as Elizabeth on The View said --- "When in doubt, just make-out!" Bachelor goes into a full steamy make-out session which they don't do on Jane Austen!!! What these poor girls don't understand is that for two out of three of them -- its Kiss-Off, Honey!!!
But what that guy doesn't understand, opening the heart is hard for anyone. It may be easier for women but that doesn't mean it was easy. And it was then, I felt those poor girls' pain. I could hear the wheels turning in the Bachelor's brain ........... "Got to go! Got to go NOW!!"
In reality, it is at this point that the poor girl grabs the phone and calls her best friend. "But ........ he asked", she cries. And the wise best friend replies ........"He's a man." (This is the problem with The Bachelor -- no best friends on the other line, telling her to run!!!)
Which leads me to pink-- blue. Our dear friends, Debbie and Jim teach a Marriage Enrichment class called "Love and Respect". Women want love, men want respect. And we are wired so differently, we have a hard time seeing the others' point of view. Its BETA vs VHS -- Edison vs Tesla (Can ya tell I'm married to someone in engineering??)
I am lucky to have a marriage that is based on love and respect. Some people say marriage is hard work. For us ....... it isn't. I married a man that became my soul-mate, my friend, my partner, my lover. Who knows how we found each other and why it works the way it does ........ but it does.
So Honey --- would ya stay healthy for me?? I need you with me. Cuz if I ever have to go through this kind of crap again.......... I'm killin' ya!!!