Wednesday, August 14, 2013

What would you do????

There is a show on television called "What would you do?" 

It shows "uncomfortable" staged lifelike situations and wonders what you would do as a by-stander. This post is not about that.

It is about my home ...... my business .......and my life.  And boundaries ---- where and if, they exist.

For the last 12 years .... I have been closed on Monday and Tuesday.  This year I chose to add Wednesday to the "closed" days.  I am happier, more content and business has not suffered for it.

Yesterday was Tuesday ....... it was 10:30 and I had been putting around the house in my yoga pants and tee-shirt.  I fed the chickens.  I canned some tomato sauce.  I scrubbed the bathroom floor.  I hung laundry on the line.  A shower was in the plans ..... but I hadn't gotten that far and I was okay with the decision.

Pajamas felt good until two vans pulled into my lane.  They were filled with parents and children.  They were  coming for a day on the farm.

There had been no phone calls ....... there had been no reservations.  And as I make inquires, I still have yet to determine who organized the event.

In the end ... there were 9 mothers and around 18 children in my yard.

And I told them I was closed. 

A very polite mother stated my sign clearly says that I am closed on Tuesdays.  My webpage says ... closed Monday through Wednesday.  Our Facebook page states hours of operation.

Several mothers were not happy. I felt their frustration.  They drove 20 miles to be told that I was closed. 

Why can't you open??

There have been times .... I have opened.  I have greeted people and said, "Come on! Let's cut flowers!"

I did not do that yesterday.

The people-pleasing gene is powerful.  I can feel guilty from just a disgusted glance. 

And yes, I feel guilty.

Eventually, there will be a gate at the end of the lane.  It will be closed when we are not at home.  But I will not gate myself off from the rest of the world when I am at home! 

So where are the boundaries??  And how do I enforce them without guilt or blocking myself from the rest of the world?

And how do I change the perception that I am not a park?  I am a working flower farm at my home .... I welcome well-behaved children and groups.  This is how I make my living.  But every time you let your child roam unsupervised or climb a tree or stand on the swing ..... my insurance agent and I hyper-ventilate!!

So I am questioning myself and my actions.

What would you do??


4 comments:

Susie said...

I would stick to my guns. When you are closed, you are closed. We only have so many days off to get all of OUR stuff done, like, cleaning, shopping, cleaning, canning, washing clothes, feeding the troops, cleaning and all the rest of the things that others don't do. Not to mention, trying to get a shower without always looking out the front window for those who can not read signs. We have to have some time off too, or we would go nuts, for which I already have done! Stick to your guns, Miss Effie, stick to your guns!

Michelle said...

I would get a gate and only open it when I am "open." (We have an electric gate that came with the place, and it is always closed unless we are passing through or "lock" it open. No home business here, just dogs and other animals.) A fair percentage of people just do not read signs, or choose to ignore them; a gate is the only way to prevent "unwanted invasions." Oh, you will get a few who will park at the gate and WALK up to your house to inquire if you are open . . . some people refuse to be trained . . . .

Kelly said...

If you state your hours and days of being open clearly, then you have no choice but to stay closed when you've posted you will be closed. I work at a place that is on the same property that my boss lives and there are people that will show up on Sunday evening and say, "can you just......" It's rude and intrusive to assume people are just sitting around with nothing to do but wait on a customer that might stop by and need $5.00 worth of stuff. After all, you are not a vet and there wasn't a dying family pet in their arms. Don't devalue yourself or your personal time, because if you do, others will follow your lead. RESPECT.....my father demanded it from us and so that lesson stuck.

megan blogs said...

I would update my sign to include Wednesday. I'd make it a detachable part, in case i wanted to reopen on Wednesdays.

I must admit, there are times where i've looked at the real sign rather than look on Da Web or fb. Which is why i sometimes find places closed that i think should be open or vice-versa.