Monday, July 8, 2013

Update ............

Back in April, I wrote this post about depression.  I have been on medication for 90 days now and I wanted to share how I feel and how I felt.

First of all ......... I FEEL FANTASTIC!!!!

I respond extremely well to medication ... and I know that.  But what I had tried to do in the last 10 years was to live without it. .  So I prayed more, surrounded myself with people that loved me and thought I would be ok.    There is a stigma that if you take medication ... you are weak.  No one would ever say that if I had high blood pressure or diabetes.

But with depression .... it is another story.

Bottom line .... I can not go without Prozac.

I think that is the best word to describe my days............ I feel lighter!!!!

First all, depression rears its ugly head a couple of different ways in me.

I sleep too much ......... I can not get enough sleep.  It could be noon .... and I will be ready for a nap.  It could be 7:30 and I will be horizontal on the couch.  Some people ........ don't sleep at all.

I eat too much .... food comforts me.  Helpings are larger.  More carbs .... more breads .... lots more sweets.  For other people,  they don't eat.

And I hyper-focus.  I focus on things that I do well.  It make be the job I had .... it may be a craft project.  But all my energy and work goes toward that.  And nothing else.

Some people have a difficult time focusing.  And when I started my meds, I was having trouble with staying on a task.  I would bribe myself to finish the dishes, make the bed, plant this row.  I consciously had to work through the project.

Now .... I start my list and can easily cross off projects.

I still have a lot of recovering to do.  My house is a disaster .... from the hyper-focus thing. And the business of this time of year does not help! But slowly I am climbing out of problem.

I am happy ......... but more importantly........ I am joyful.

Life will never be perfect.  I will never be perfect.  I will always disappoint someone or won't be liked by somebody else. It is their loss.

Cuz I'm pretty cool ......... even with meds. 

Just as you are!

5 comments:

Michelle said...

A good post, Miss Eff. My husband has been on generic Prozac since his heart attack, and while he still sleeps too much, he is better in other ways. I am thankful.

I take 5-HTP and that works for me. If I stop taking it for any length of time, I feel all my ends start to unravel and JUST.CAN'T.COPE.

Ginny said...

Aww so glad to hear that meds are working.

Miss Effie said...

Perfect description, Michelle ........ ends unraveling! That is it! And you feel it from the inside out!!!

:)

Barb said...

You know what you need to do for YOU and that's all that counts. Glad you are doing so well. We all need a content Miss Effie.....you make our world sparkle!

Amy McPherson Sirk said...

I'm so glad you found what is working for you. I have considered antidepressants but I'm not there, yet. I'm making good progress in counseling, working on the PTSD. It's a struggle but I don't want to medicate until I figure out what I'm like when I'm stabilized. I have to say though, a good night's sleep would be better than gold. Best of luck and enjoy living in the light.